THE VILLAGE JEFE

Originally published in Western Outdoor News Aug. 28, 2007

There are certain given “truths” I have found in Mexico that are inalienable. Nothing will ever change about them and you can take it to the bank. It’s a bit like Murphy’s law.

A few examples:

The slowest car at the border crossing is always in YOUR lane on a Sunday afternoon or Monday morning.

Ice melts too fast

No one stops at stop signs in a Mexican neighborhood

The best places to eat would never get an “A” rating back home in your neighborhood from the health department

In your hotel shower, the letter “C” does not mean cold. It means “caliente” (hot) and you will burn yourself!

At the worst possible time you will find out Mexican toilet paper is really thin

Everyone loves stickers

A spanking clean house can still have dirt floors

It is better to have a bad boat and great skipper than a great boat and bad skipper

There’s no such thing as a free lunch; free fishing trip or free shopping spree at a timeshare presentation

A hot chilis eaten now bites back later in many forms. Fire in. Fire out. You are impressing no one.


One other truth I have found the longer I live down here is that if you want to get something done, fast, efficiently and with the least amount of hassle, find the neighborhood “jefe.” (boss) Every pueblo has one. Every barrio (neighborhood) has one whether you call him “jefe”, “tio” (uncle), “patron” (protector) or some other name.


The jefe is many things. I suppose in places like Sicily or New Jersey he would be called “Godfather.” The man (and sometimes a woman) makes things happen.


He is many things to many people. He probably is “uncle” to many in the neighborhood, not to mention the real godfather to half the kids. Why not? He was probably the matchmaker at some point. He knows everyone and everyone knows him.


He is sometimes judge and arbitrator between disputing neighbors. You ask him for advice and counsel. You don’t make big moves without asking the jefe.


Often one of the more affluent persons in the neighborhood, he may have a dirt floor, but he’s got a satellite dish. He is often the banker/lender when it comes to financing that new car or washer/dryer. He holds money and accounts and is asked to give counsel when folks have a problem.


He’s a grade-A hustler. Need tires? Ask him first. He’ll set you up with a friend of a friend. Concrete work? His cousin is in the business. Nintendo for Christmas? He’s got a connection up in California and someone to drive it down. Nice car for your daugther’s wedding? Juan at the Ford dealer owes the jefe a favor.


Indeed, just about everyone owes him a favor. He knows the accountants, lawyers, body shop owners; the chief of police and all the restaurant owners. He and the mayor went to school together and he can walk into the mayor’s office at any time.


Yessiree. Services are free, but tipping is welcome and a commission structure can always be organized along the guidelines of the mutual back-scratchers association. He’s worth the time and money.


You do not throw a baptism without the jefe. He’s there at every wedding and quincinera (coming out party). No social event is complete without him. He sits at the head table. There’s not too much the jefe cannot do.


For gringos trying to operate in a place where language, culture, politics, religion, and social norms are a difficult forum to navigate, finding a jefe can make life a lot easier. Try doing things yourself for awhile. Gnash your teeth. Get your blood boiling as you deal with the the frustrations of seemingly simple things like getting your car tuned up or subscribing to cable TV or how to get a dentist for a dropped filling.


Find a jefe and life suddenly gets simpler. Things and people appear by magic. Wheels get greased. Show your appreciation with returned thoughtfulness and you’ll probably make a friend for life and find your own “in” to the complexities of Mexican living.


Even if you’re not going to live or work down here, having a local jefe as a contact to help you and your buddies navigate around town is invaluable. It can be a favorite taxi driver (always well connected if he’s worth his salt) or your favorite captain or bellman. They’ll direct you to restaurants; entertainment; services and other things you might not have found on your own. Tips are appreciated and believe me, every year you come back, you’ll have a friend waiting.


Lastly…


JONATHAN got snookered. I recently touted the “fact” that on August 27th, the planet Mars would be so close to earth that it would appear 2 full moons would be in the evening sky. It would not happen again in our lifetimes. NOT! Turns out it was a hoax! I got the info from a doctor friend who got it from a scientist friend, etc. etc. All of us fell for it. Sorry! At least it’s not as bad as falling for the one where Bill Gates and Microsoft will give me a zillion dollars!


That’s my story. If you ever want to reach me, my e-mail is riplipboy@aol.com.

BAJA BITS AND PIECES

Originally Published In Western Outdoor News the week of Aug. 21, 2007


Every couple of weeks, I need to clear off all the sticky-pad notes stuck on my cork board down here. Ergo… some bits and pieces from around the Baja State for you:

FLY THE FRIENDLY SKIES

More signs that things will never be your daddy’s Baja any longer. Mexican President Calderon has pledged expansion of the San Jose and Loreto Airports. Additionally, remember the old runway in front of the Hotel Palmas de Cortez that got turned into a golf course? It used to be fun watching planes dodge cattle and slip down in between cars and the boat yard to land in what was basically the parking lot!


Well, there’s rumblings now of perhaps building a real life international airport on the East Cape. Just imagine! Can’t wait. Hold me back. It will be interesting to see where they put it. I can think of some residents of Los Barriles that could give you an answer as to where to put it.



WE’LL LEAVE THE LIGHT ON FOR YOU


One hotel closes and another goes on the block. The Hacienda Del Cortez Hotel that many of you may remember as the Hotel Posada de Engelbert on La Paz Bay has finally closed down. It was probably a merciful demise.


If the name sounds familiar, it’s because it was once owned by the famous singer who’s real name was Arnold George Dorsey (Engelbert Humperdink…mom loved him!) Perhaps it was for the better. In it’s day it was quite the place to stay but had languished for a number of years. Stay posted. No doubt, condos and timeshares to follow.


Conversely, Hotel Las Arenas, that grand old gem of the northern East Cape/ La Paz area is up for sale again. If you have deep pockets with about$ 36 million in it, check this out: http://www.doradoproperties.info/detalle.php?id=011-12&en=true It was always a favorite of many of us. It says it’s 9,000 acres of beachfront. If you buy it, call me!


It was a great place to stay in it’s day as well, but has been closed now for almost 5 seasons. The previous owners who purchased it from the old owners never did anything with it. While you’re at it, you can also buy adjacent Cerralvo Island which is being sold for $48 million at last check. Hasn’t every kid always wanted to own their own island? It’s just money.




SINCE NONE OF US FISH ON A FULL MOON ANYWAY…


Not a blue moon. Not a paper moon. Not a “drop trouser” moon. Actually on Aug. 27th at about 12:30 a.m. you can see something that no one alive will ever see again.


The planet Mars will be so close and so bright that it will be as large and as bright as the full moon that evening so that it will appear like Earth has two moons! Some places in Baja are selling “skywatch” evenings with which to view the phenomenon which will not be seen again the year 2287. Telescopes extra.


EVEN DOWN HERE YOU JUST CAN’T GET AHEAD


Oh-oh. So much for our Rosarito condo, Honey. The Hacienda (Mexico’s IRS) has some 60 field agents amped up and looking for foreign owners of property who rent them out and do not report the income!


Apparently, the hotel industry is ticked off at all the lost revenue so they put the screws to the Hacienda to get after all these property owners renting out vacation properties. Some agents are even going door-to-door.


Penalties could include loss of property rights. The payment is actually only a fraction, but you still have to pay it and the problem is lots of gringos just don’t know how to do it or think they had to do it. NOT! Go talk to your Mexican accountant.


GOING DOWN OVER AND UNDER


For those of you headed north or worried about those headed north, illegal border crossings have dropped sharply into the U.S. Declines are attributed to higher surveillance technology; better cooperation between the countries and their respective agencies; and 6000 National Guards troops lending a hand. (The Imperial Valley Desert beats the Iraqi desert hands down! You can always go home on the weekends!)


For those headed south, to allay the fears of gringo travelers who are paranoid that every Mexican police officer can’t wait to snag American tourists, several areas are considering the implementation of “no ticket zones.” Kind of like a “Pass Go” on the Monopoly board.


In the “zone,” they cannot give you a ticket. They can’t even stop you! Does that mean you can do what you want? Can you scream “alli alli I’m free!” when you get in “the zone?” Yell “sanctuary!” like Quasimodo when you step over the “zone line?” Conversely, are the police waiting for you when you step out?


THE COST OF A PASSPORT


With all the passport fiasco that took place this year requiring all travelers in North America to have a passport, this is what came out of a report from Washington:


“The price of a passport: $311,491 in back child support payments for a U.S. businessman now living in China; $46,000 for a musician seeking to perform overseas, and $45,849 for a man planning a Dominican Republic vacation.The new passport requirements that have complicated travel this summer also have uncovered untold numbers of child support scofflaws and forced them to pay millions.The State Department denies passports to noncustodial parents who owe more than $2,500 in child support. Once the parents make good on their debts, they can reapply for passports.”


THE LATEST ON SHARK NORMA

Not a darned thing. Nothing but silence from the feds. Fish on!


That’s my story. If you ever want to reach me, my e-mail is riplipboy@aol.com.

THE LONG AND SHORT OF BAJA RODS

Originally published in Western Outdoor News the week of Aug. 14, 2007

I guess I’ve gotten enough e-mails over the last few weeks with guys asking about packing for upcoming Baja trips regarding rods that I guess enough folks are interested and it’s time to put in my two centavos.

Basically, what’s a good rod for Baja?

Well, asking me that question is like asking Imelda Marcos which shoes to wear dancing or Tiger Woods if he can win the Masters using only one club! I’m a confirmed tackle junkie like lots of you. I have rods I insist that I NEED and keep buying more telling myself I NEED them, but there’s no way in this green planet that I will EVER be able to use all these rods! I’ve got rods I bought or were given to me or made for me 5 years ago that still are still in plastic. But, by gawd…I NEEDED ‘em at the time!

Don’t laugh. Many of you are the same way and you hope to heavens your significant other doesn’t ever discover the truth because we all justify the purchase of our toys by telling ourselves (and others) that we NEEDED that 665 XXH with roller guides or we would simply die. And we swear we will use them into infinity…just like that boat…and that shotgun. . . and that jetski and…and…and… Right?

We’ll, here’s my take on rods.

I love long rods. My hands tremble when I know I can grab my long stick and fire an iron the length of a football field and skip jig it and bounce it off the heads of crashing tuna. I love knowing that with a flick of the wrist, my ‘dine can be right on the boil or inches from the paddy.

And then the strike and the hum and that special chill you get when you look up and see your long rod bent perfectly in a classic “high stick” and you lean into your rod on that first burning run!

Rewind. Stop the film.

But that’s not always practical for Baja. I love long rods, but for the Baja, I’m a short rod guy. (And that has nothing to do with the fact that I’m also a short guy too!)

My typical Baja stick is under 7 feet long for several reasons.

First, if you’ve never tried to jostle through a busy airport with a nine-foot rod tube, try it sometime. See how many friends you make as you whack people on the head or try to transport it.

Next, the airlines are getting more and more restrictive on the size of tubes. One airline that starts with the letter before “E,” charges as much as 100 bucks ONE way. OUCH. For 200 extra bucks, my jig stick and other long rods can stay home in the closet.

From the perspective of fishing over the years, I’ve found that I really don’t need the long stick. Most of the time I’m on a cruiser or panga. A long stick is good to get distance on a cast and get your bait or jig away from the boat. That’s a truism when you’re on a party boat. You’re subject to the fact that there’s probably a lot of other anglers aboard and no one is going to move the boat so you can be closer to the fish. Hence, you gotta cast to the fish and the ability to throw distance is a plus.

In Baja, you’re not on a party boat. If the fish are 50 yards away, well duh…MOVE THE BOAT!

That means I do not need quite such a long rod, even if I wanted to throw irons since getting “distance” isn’t as important.

Long rods are notoriously bad for fighting fish anyway. The longer the rod, the harder it is to put pressure on a fish. It’s like being on a teeter-totter and giving your partner a longer end. It’s harder to lift your partner and easier for your partner to lift you. Same thing with fishing.

A shorter rod gives you, the angler, better lifting ability. That’s why trolling rods are short pieces of artillery and not long and “whippy.” They can “pull.”

My ideal Baja stick is between 5.5 and 7 feet long. It does have a softer tip (perhaps up to the 2nd but no more than the 3rd guide from the tip) which is known as a “fast taper” rod. This allows me the ability to cast, but does not diminish my ability to fight fish.

That’s because the rest of the rod is basically backbone stiff. This is where I get my lift.

The thing with fishing in Baja is you never know what’s gonna bite your worm. One minute it’s a punk dorado and the next Moby-the-Blue-Marlin is hooked up. If I’m on a long stick or a stick that’s as soft as a noodle, it’s gonna be a long long day and probably pretty painful both when I’m fighting the fish in the hot Baja sun and then when that slugger finally pops off. Seee-yaaaaaaaaaaa….

Bottom line, the shorter rod, does the job.


That’s my story. If you ever want to reach me, my e-mail is riplipboy@aol.com.

THE WAHOO EDGE!

Originally published the week of Aug. 7, 2007 in Western Outdoor News

When talking about the “holy grail” of fish in the Southern Baja waters, many anglers would probably say, it’s the marlin. After all, these bad boys are pretty much the “poster children” for any magazine, newspaper, or advertising picture ever used related to Baja. Their images and logos are pretty much on everything from bumper stickers to t-shirts.

Why not? They’re big. They look good. The blonde in the bikini holding the rod next to the hanging fish makes for a good Kodak moment. Yada.Yada. Yada…yawn…

Talk to the salty boys, however, and mention the word “wahoo” and their eyes glaze over as if you had mentioned the fabled city of El Dorado to a Spanish conquistador or the existence of Big Foot to a Canadian lumberjack or Moby Dick to Captain Ahab. Many seek but few actually find!

“Aye, laddie, they do indeed exist. I’ve been chasing ‘em for years and many is the time my rod took a mighty bend only to suddenly go limp and I reel in a severed line. Many are the trolling lures I have with serrated teeth marks across their flanks! And one day, I shall have my wahoo!”

You can almost hear him willing to offer 20 gold pieces for just one solid hook-up let alone putting one in the boat. Surely a fish to make grown men weep and their wives shake their heads over all the fuss for a fish that looks like a big mackerel with teeth.

However, unless you’ve fought these speedsters that can reach 70 mph bursts or seen the skull full of teeth that can cut through 100 pound leader or tasted the delicious meat, it won’t make sense.

But looking at the some of the fish scores around the Baja lately, especially, the southern Baja, it looks like larger numbers of the fish respectfully called “Mr.Hoo” are moving up and in.

Wahoo are a bit like cats. Show them a fuzzy ball and they won’t give a hoot. Roll the ball across their faces and they pounce. Wahoo are like that. They attack their prey so trolling is often one of the primary ways to locate these fish.

Three of the most popular lures are the Rapala-type lipped lures; the Marauder-type swimming lures; and the heavy chrome jet head skirts.
If I’m using the lipped lures, the larger the better. I’m talking the CD-18 sizes or larger. Smaller than that and you run the risk of the wahoo getting his entire mouth around the lure and cutting you off or the hooks not sinking in deep enough into the hard mouth.

If you can, switch out the treble hooks for single Siwash hooks. Treble hooks sometimes don’t penetrate as deeply and when the fish torques and spins during a fight, it can sometimes torque itself right off to freedom. On the other hand, a single hook buries deep and often the second hook swings back and penetrates the wahoo from a different angle insuring a more solid hookup.

With the Marauder-type trolling lures, again, the single hooks are preferable. However, instead of the largest lures, I prefer the medium size. To me (and I’m sure I’ll get arguments on this), the medium ones have the greater tendency to imbed both hooks into the fish during the battle. The larger lures will only sink one hook into the mouth. The smaller size…well…I am told wahoo have notoriously bad eyesight so I like the largest lure I can get away with.

With the skirted jet heads, the bigger, heavier and nastier the better. I still have my first one made for me almost 20 years ago by Jorge, the long-time chef on the long range boat Red Rooster III. The thing must weigh about a pound and consists of a big chrome jet-head; a garish plastic “goblin skirt” (orange and black), and a tandem of 8/0 stainless steel hooks that mean business. I’ve since made many of my own and these are deadly good.

Color-wise, I like all my lures either as dark as possible or almost as tastelessly bright as possible. . Purple and black (Ninja) is a killer. But, the wahoo like the other end of the spectrum as well. Fluorescent orange gets hit and my orange with black striped (Tony the Tiger) Marauder has been hit so many times, there’s not much left of the paint and both eyes are missing. The chartreuse-colored Rapala called “fire tiger” is also a killer. I’ve never seen a live baitfish out there that’s bright orange or chartreuse so I have no idea wassup with those colors, but believe me, they work!

If I’m running a pattern behind the boat, I prefer the darker ones trolled close up near or in the prop wash creating a silhouette to a trailing wahoo. With my lighter colored lures, I tend to keep them further back in the clearer water running deep.

Keep the leaders short when rigging up. I prefer dark swivels to shiny chrome swivels. My leaders are no more than 18 inches long. I’ve seen tests showing that swivels moving through the water cavitate and shimmy just like a smaller baitfish and wahoo are known to hit the moving swivel instead of the lure. See-yaa…there goes your expensive 30 dollar lure! Shorter leaders keep the fish focused on your lure. Darker swivels look less like a swimming sardine being chased by your lure!

Wire leaders? That’s a 10 page discussion, I’ll save for another column! I say yes!




That’s my story. If you ever want to reach me, my e-mail is riplipboy@aol.com.